Posted by: jolantru | June 20, 2012

Path Of Kindness: Fourteen

Sar picked sar clothes and donned them, looking at me.

“These are sar clothes,” Sar said, “Mine.”

“Sa,” I said evenly. “You made up your own gender pronoun.”

Sa smiled, the firelight casting gold on sar hair. “There is only one me.”

I paused, trying to word my thoughts as carefully as I could. “Was it because of this you left your home?”

Sa turned away, an abrupt action.


“I guess we are both heretics,” I hugged Sar impulsively. “I am quai.”

Sa laughed.


Sa is just a sound, neither romani nor rampai. Not huayu. Not even englis. Sa is sar name. Sa is just Sa.

Sa confuses me.


“Isn’t it strange for you to carry a blade?” Sa asks me one morning. I have just changed. Heart’s cloth diapers and fed her milk. She is warm against my chest, fat hands holding onto my breast.

“Why not?” I counter back, stung somewhat. “I need to protect myself.”

Sa snorts. “This is the Innerlands. It is safe.”

“Heart was abandoned,” I say curtly. “A safe place does not do this.”

Green eyes watch me. I can drown in those green depths.

“Babies are seldom abandoned. Heart is an exception.”

“No baby should ever be abandoned,” I hug Heart closer. Fierce tenderness floods me. “Neither should people.”

Sa stares straight ahead, back rigid. “So says the coastal dweller.”

“I am a daughter of the sea, earth-dweller,” I hiss back. “You should respect Her.” Heart stirs and whimpers as if sensing my anger.

The following hour is a stretch of quiet agony. I remember Shu and her gentle hands. Even Dongzhen, the silly boy.

Mother. Pa. Everyone.

Mostly Shu.


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